A few days ago while driving down the street, I saw a young man walking with a young boy–apparently his son. They didn’t seem to be in any hurry, and they were holding hands.
What struck me was the ear to ear grin the little boy had on his face. I imagined him feeling safe and secure, without a care or worry in the world, as long as he held on to Dad. I have vague memories of feeling that way when I was a young boy–any and all of my needs and fears were met by my parents.
When I first got to CA, I struggled with the “God” stuff. I needed a confirmation that God was there for me–that he loved me and would take care of me.
What I was looking for was for him to reveal Himself to me on my terms instead of His. Through the years, he has made his involvement known to me hundreds of times. What it took was my abandoning ALL of my old ideas–in other words, turning my will and life over to Him ABSOLUTELY.
While I recognize how impossible it is to do His will perfectly, I strive for the willingness to consider what He wants me to do. To me, I strive for my relationship with my heavenly father to be like that of the young boy on the walk with his dad. If I can accomplish that much, I have a reasonably good chance of staying sober and having a decent life.